Life Is Not Short, The Problem Is That We Start To Live It Late
We often complain about how short life is, when in fact the problem is that we start late to really live it. Only when we drop the expired masks, weights and ties, do we take the step: we finally open the door to that beautiful creature that, like a hungry wolf, emerges free in search of its own territory.
Okot p’Bitek was an interesting Ugandan poet and writer who devoted much of his career to extolling traditional African culture. According to him, people will never be completely free. We all occupy a position in our society: we are children, brothers, mothers or medicine men. However, all these links are nothing more than points of origin. Because we also have the opportunity to create new horizons, while still maintaining common roots.
We all came to this world free. However, life, our families and the very social context that surrounds us is gradually shaping us with its many hands and warm breaths. Far from assuming each inscribed line and each shape, we are the authentic artisans, we who at a given moment will have to choose what to accept from this transmission of values and teachings and what to deny.
Okot p’Bitek left us great wisdom in books like “Son of Lawino”. We will never stop being someone’s children, someone’s brothers or natives of a specific people … However,
And you, have you really started living?
The concept of “truly living” may be puzzling to many. Aren’t we all alive? Don’t we enjoy the gift of life just by being born and breathing at this very moment? The truth is that there is a clear difference between existing and achieving that full life where one genuinely enjoys what he is, what he has and what he does. Because between when we are born and when we leave this world there is a precious time called life that deserves to be used with intensity.
Now, but how to do it? How to promote this awakening? Erich Fromm, a famous German psychoanalyst, social psychologist and humanist, used to say that human beings spend a large part of their existence adjusting to what society labels as normal, thinking that this is “the good and the correct”. However, most of the time we end up anchored in certain bonds, behaviors and activities that go against our authentic desires.
We swallow our bitter frustrations and hide our longings in the depths of our being like rusty ships, like sad relics that it is better not to look at because everyday life drags us down. Because you have to comply, fit in and be part of that gear that makes up the single thought where, of course, there is no freedom. Waking up from this sad dream requires courage. Because only those who are willing to start their own personal revolution will begin to live as they truly want.
Keys to start living the life you want
Let’s go back now to that fact we talked about at the beginning of the article, quoting the Ugandan writer Okot p’Bitek. Today, there are various aspects that undoubtedly define you, whether you want it or not. You are someone’s child, you are a brother / sister, and you are a partner or friend. In turn, you also have a certain position in this society marked by your job performance.
- These things link you to certain entities, but they do not have to define you until your decision-making capacity is vetoed: close if it gives you happiness, distant if it causes you suffering.
- Stop pretending. This aspect is essential, we must be able to stop pretending that we are fine when what surrounds us burns us from the inside. Stop saying “I’m great” when it’s not like that . Don’t turn your head anymore when you don’t like something. Be authentic, that your thoughts go in accordance with your actions and that your voice sounds firmly.
- Learn to quit. Understand that to start living the existence you really want, you may have to leave many things, many people behind.
- Live in the present moment, practice mindfulness, and remember that the best time for everything is always NOW.
- Follow your intuitions. Learn to listen to yourself, to give value to that inner voice that tells you before anyone else what is worthwhile and what is not.
In conclusion. Remember that it is not really about living long or short, it is only about giving meaning to each moment and valuing your own life for what it is: a gift that we cannot miss.
Images courtesy of Sophie Wilkins
