Mindfulness For Couples: How Can You Improve The Relationship?

The couple is one of the most important people in our life. Not just because of the amount of time we spend with her; but, above all, because of the high level of emotional intimacy that is created between the two.

Thus, a healthy and enriching relationship fills us with happiness and confidence; meanwhile, one marked by conflicts and disagreements can affect us very negatively. Fortunately, mindfulness for couples offers proposals that prevent the wear and tear of the relationship and help improve the quality of the bond. 

Mindfulness is a discipline that focuses on directing attention to the present moment, without judging it or trying to change it. This helps us to maintain a more open and tolerant attitude, to know ourselves better, and to interact with others in a healthy way. All these benefits undoubtedly influence the couple’s relationship; But, below we explain in what specific way they do it.

Presence

How many times have you been looking at your mobile while your partner was talking to you? How many times have you found yourself wandering your mind instead of enjoying the other person’s company? Offering attention and presence to the sentimental partner is essential to create emotional intimacy ; however, it is costly to us.

Mindfulness for couples helps us to have greater control of our attention and invites us to focus on the present moment when we are with the other, engaging with our five senses.

Acceptance

Acceptance is one of the main premises of mindfulness, and when applied to the couple, it can have an important positive impact. Conflicts often arise because one of the parties wants the other to change in some way, to change their behavior, hobbies or way of thinking.

Accepting the sentimental partner as he is, without expecting him to be what I want or what I had imagined is an act of deep respect. But, in addition, it is the basis for building a healthy relationship.

Mindfulness for couples enhances flexibility

Rigid thought patterns are damaging on a personal level, but they also greatly affect your relationship. The love bond does not remain static, it changes and develops as its members do. And this is necessary so that the relationship does not fall into the routine and an automatic pilot is not activated that ends up disconnecting us from the other.

If the relationship does not adapt to the different vital moments of each member of the couple, it is no longer satisfactory and enriching. Offering resistance to change generates suffering, embracing it can take us to another level.

Managing emotions

In general, people do not know how to relate to our negative emotions. These are extremely unpleasant to us, we want to get rid of them immediately and, in addition, we allow that emotional intensity to control our actions.

Thus, we often interpret neutral gestures as offensive or threatening and we react by putting ourselves on guard. Our brain activates the “fight or flight” mode and we enter into dynamics of conflict or indifference that are very harmful.

Practicing mindfulness helps us calm the mind and take control of those automatic responses. We no longer react, but deliberately decide how to act. And in this way, we are in a position to reconsider the situation and avoid conflict.

Greater knowledge

Mindfulness for couples allows us to know ourselves better and to know when we are reacting from our own hurts and fears. However, it also helps us to more easily detect the state of the other person, to identify and understand their emotions and needs.

Analyzing the state of the relationship and of each of the members becomes easier and this deep knowledge gives us the possibility to act in the right direction.

Mindfulness for connected and happy couples

Ultimately, mindfulness makes us more empathetic and more self-aware. It teaches us to offer presence and from there nurture the bond, and to accept and honor the other person for who they are.

All these aspects favor the construction of a common story in the couple and allow the integration of the two personalities. For this reason, it is not only possible to prevent the breakdown of the bond and manage conflicts in a healthier way, but also to live more connected and happy relationships.