Don’t Let Anyone Make You Believe That You Don’t Deserve What You Want

Turn a deaf ear to “you don’t know”, “you don’t deserve” or “you can’t”. The first step of personal growth is the liberation of everything that violates and that curtails, because if you know what you are and what you are worth, you must do everything possible to achieve what you do deserve: happiness.

In the millionaire industry of personal growth, it is always bordered through coaching courses, books and conferences, in that complex ocean that is the achievement of happiness. However, sometimes we become desperate. We wonder if that search for balance, calm and achievement will be nothing more than a Holy Grail, an unattainable entelechy.

We could safely say that there is no correct theory of happiness. Actually, there are many. All you have to do is take ingredients from all of them to create our own formula based on those complexities and needs that define us, without forgetting to include one more additive: courage.

Because what you deserve is beyond the borders of fear. Beyond the vetoes of those who put strings to the cracks of your insecurities. Take power away from them and start modifying your cognitive styles to take control of these turbulent seas that take us away from our islands of calm. Of our authentic identities.

We suggest you delve into these issues with us.

When you forget what you deserve and you become invisible

Sometimes it happens. It happens that we become invisible, that our voice becomes the echo of other voices or that our needs and desires disappear to mutate into new ones that better fit the expectations of others. We do not know very well how it all started, but what we do perceive is the pain when breathing and the cold current of that self-esteem so threadbare, so battered.

We could blame it on our family, so toxic and selfish. We could also blame this chaotic and painful emotional relationship for our unhappiness. However, and although it sounds harsh, the responsibility is ours alone. It is not the environment that generates anxiety, it is the way in which we link ourselves to these scenarios, to these people to the point of becoming invisible, of becoming captives of fear.

We must be aware, we must put aside what we feel to remember what we deserve. Something like this can only be achieved by being fully responsible for ourselves. Ruminant thoughts and indecision make us fall into the abysses of fear to the point of allowing others to decide for us. Others who tell us what you deserve and what you don’t.

Do not allow it: wear armor that is your size, wear stronger soles and walk a new life path inhabited by personal responsibility and determination. You deserve what you want.

Strategies to achieve what you really deserve

First of all, keep in mind that not only you deserve to be happy. The others also have the right, but they can do it in their own way, as they wish, and they can do it. We will do it our way but without hurting.

• We are sure that throughout your life you have made many, many sacrifices for others. Now, remind yourself from today on something essential: to live together you do not have to sacrifice always and every day. Living together involves building, and if what you’ve been doing so far is losing, it’s time to start winning.

• We are now going to practice what is known as healthy selfishness. This art implies ceasing to carry out self-denial to reconcile the respect of others with personal desires and needs.

• Being a “respectful selfish” is not easy, especially because many of us have been educated in the idea that you have to please your neighbor, that the good son makes the family happy and the good couple leaves everything for being loved.

• Now, nothing and no one can and should be above your vital rights. Because if others drag you towards the currents of ninguneo, from zero to the left and “you don’t know”, “you don’t deserve”, they will be trying to make you vulnerable and controllable.

Do not allow it, put distance if necessary and just breathe.

What you deserve, want and need is beyond those environments where you are invisible and where your voice does not count. Because remember, your whole person counts, your whole being is beautiful, brave and capable of achieving whatever you have in mind.

The most important ingredient to be happy is yourself.

* Recommended reading: “Healthy selfishness. Taking Care of Yourself Without Feeling Guilty ”by Rachael and Richard Heller. Urano Editions. Barcelona, ​​2007.