Getting To The Root Of Problems In 2 Steps

Countless people have problems that they confirm that they have not been able to solve. They have wanted to change something and have not been able to. The most important task is to inquire, reflect, find the whys and what exactly is happening. It is the only way to get to the root of the problems. However, we must be honest and sincere with ourselves.

Keep in mind that if you have not been able to improve as you wanted, it is not because your problem has no remedy, but because you have not found the solution, or the techniques that can be effective in your specific case. However, this does not mean that, without the proper apprenticeship, they are not within your reach.

Get to the root of problems in 2 steps

1. Deep reflection: what is wrong with me?

You have to do a great analysis about what happens, getting as much information as possible, you can answer the following questions:

What is wrong with me or what do I want to change?

Even if you think you know what’s wrong with you, sometimes you don’t explore enough to discover important things. It is about doing a deep study on what the real problem is. Normally most do not go into details, they limit themselves to summarizing in a few words, without actually specifying.

For example, someone telling you, “My problem is that I am insecure,” does not answer the question. It should detail exactly, in which situations you feel more insecurities, in which others you feel more secure, what factors, both external and internal, increase or decrease this insecurity.

Why is this happening to me?

The whys are highly important. Take your time and explore your interior. You know the reason for your problems, but sometimes it is difficult to recognize them. Remember that everything you discover about yourself will be positive for you.

Following the previous example of insecurity, to answer the why of this insecurity, we could delve into the depths of our fears. Why am I afraid of this? Because of perfectionism? Or, perhaps, because of fear of rejection? Because in the past I was not positively reinforced or unpleasant things happened to me?

What exactly am I afraid of?

Stating that we are afraid does not answer us what is most important. What exactly is it that produces that fear? Analyze those fears in relation to the problem. For instance:

“Speaking in public makes me insecure, because I don’t do well doing it.” But even if you didn’t do it right, what are you afraid of? What’s the worst that could happen? Appearing insecure? Being rejected? Being seen as a freak? receive criticism or ridicule? … What would happen if some of that happened? Would it be so unbearable? You have all the answers, and inside you are the tools so that you do not care so much what others think about you.

Once you know yourself well, you can go on to solve it. But if you do not know exactly and in detail what your problem is, you will not be able to eliminate it.

2. Think of alternative arguments

Discuss your problem, what you think about it. If you have not been able to solve it, it is because your thoughts lead you to a dead end. However, if you change the perspective, everything can take a turn.

For example, following the previous example. Someone may not be able to speak in public because they have very negative ideas or thoughts about themselves. Those thoughts prevent him from being able to face exposing himself to an audience.

If you put this exercise into practice and change your argument, you might dare to do it. If your previous thought was that it is not worth it, you will be seen strangely, you will do it disastrously, etc … Logically, no one with those thoughts could speak well in public.

If you change those arguments, for other opposites, such as: “I can do it well, I am valid, it does not matter much if I get nervous because it is logical and it happens to everyone, etc ..” You will be able to do it and go overcoming each time I do.

Negative thoughts stagnate more than people think. They are like a slab that we lay on top of ourselves and prevent us from doing many more things than we do. If we were to analyze the thoughts that insecure people have and those of secure people, they would be totally opposite.

While the insecure ones distrust their possibilities, they have a bad opinion of their own, they do not value themselves, etc … The safe ones, trust their tools, have a good opinion of their own, value themselves and above all they do not care if something does not go well, because they know that no one is perfect and error is human and normal.

In short, everything begins and ends with the mind, with thoughts. If we can change them, we will change too. You need to get to the root of problems and fix them from the ground up. It is not an easy task, some mastery is required, but the results will be worth it.