4 Signs You’ve Lost Yourself

How is your relationship with you? Surely this is a question that you have rarely asked yourself. And, despite the fact that we care about taking care of our ties with others, many times we neglect the one we maintain with ourselves. Therefore, we are going to list the main signs that can help you identify that you have lost yourself.

Keep in mind that self-respect, care and compassion for oneself are essential for our well-being and our mental health. However, any love that is neglected can fall into infidelity, even your own. Therefore, it is necessary to review this important relationship and make sure that it remains healthy.

You never prioritize

One of the clearest signs is never choosing yourself first when it comes to choosing. For example, you postpone your own obligations and tasks to help others fulfill theirs and even give up your time off to satisfy the wants, needs and favors that others ask of you.

Thus, everything related to you is in last place. You do not hesitate to give in to the tastes and preferences of others, forgetting your own opinion. And, ultimately, somehow it seems more relevant to be helpful to others than loyal to yourself and your needs.

You want to please

It is clear that, as social beings, we all want to please the people around us. However, when you have lost yourself, you do so even if it is necessary to step over you.

In this way, you access plans and activities that you do not like or feel like just to win the favor of others. It is really difficult for you to say “no”, because you fear, by doing so, you will lose the love or approval of the other. Thus, you may even fall into behaviors contrary to your own convictions and values ​​if someone else asks you to do so.

You ask for forgiveness without being guilty

A very common behavior in those who have lost themselves is to ask for forgiveness even though they are aware that they have not done anything wrong. The person knows that he has not acted incorrectly; However, fear of conflict, rejection, fear of abandonment prevent him from defending his position.

In this way he prefers to apologize and accept responsibility for an argument that he is not guilty of, just to reduce anxiety. In his eyes, the anger of the other is an alert that he may leave or withdraw his affection, so it is necessary to end that anger even if it means humiliating himself.

You constantly complain

Finally, it might seem that complaining is an attitude of someone loaded with self-esteem and capable of expressing what they want. However, complaints are not synonymous with assertive communication. Presenting what you think and need in a calm and respectful way is appropriate. However, when our relationships are based on constantly asking others to meet our needs, something is wrong.

If you have links in which you feel that you do not reciprocate, ask yourself why are you still in them? Similarly, reflect on whether your expectations of relationships are tight or unrealistic.

In either case, there is a fundamental lack of self-esteem and self-care; When you claim, you look for others to give you what you lack in yourself. And you are missing because it has been a long time since you stopped being for yourself.

If you have lost yourself, recover

Thus, if you see yourself reflected in the previous signals, it is likely that you have neglected more than necessary. That is why it is time for you to become aware that the relationship with yourself is the most important of all that you can maintain  and that you begin to take care of it with care and respect.

It is not easy to give up the habit of pleasing and pleasing others, especially when our self-esteem is not strengthened. However, with perseverance, every little action will lead us to recover. Start prioritizing yourself, listening to you and defending your rights and opinions. Act according to your values ​​and do not fear being abandoned, because there is nothing more painful than losing yourself.